Contributor: “Dr. J”
Dr. J offers his irreverent, slightly irrelevant, but possibly useful opinions on health and fitness. A Florida surgeon and fitness freak with a black belt in karate, he runs 50 miles a week and flies a Cherokee Arrow 200.
I don’t know what you think about New York Mayor Bloomberg’s proposal to limit soda servings to 16 ounces or less in the city, but I think that I know how McDonald’s feels about the issue.
McDonald’s should vote for limiting personal choice, freedom be dammed! Why do I think this, considering that McDonald’s is a major purveyor of the Coca-Cola products that are among the ban’s many targets? Because Ronald McDonald’s very large shoe is on the other personal-choice foot in merry old London, England.
When it comes to the Olympics in London, rather than arguing for more personal choice, McDonald’s has decided to put its money-laden foot down. It has banned the sale of any chips, as in French Fries, kicking any seller of these chips out of the field of play like a 56-meter rugby field goal unless they are selling fish with those chips.
It appears that the McDonald’s corporation has banned hundreds of food retailers at the Olympic Games venues across Britain from selling French fries during the Games.
The London Organizing Committee of the Olympic Games has made this decision due to “sponsorship obligations” with the biggest commercial food partner at the Games, our “I’m lovin’ it, if I’m sellin’ it and you’re buyin’ it,” McDonald’s.
The one exception to this rule will be the selling of the British classic, fish and chips, probably arrived at after a tense meeting between the Queen and the Clown at an undisclosed location.
The committee has warned consumers that if there is any significant resistance to this proclamation, they will take away the fish and chips and send customers to their rooms for a time-out until they can get a grip on their threatening appetites.
“Please do not give the staff grief,” the memo states. “This will only lead to us removing fish and chips completely.”
The obvious solution to this culinary roadblock was suggested years ago by the Jack Nicholson character in “Five Easy Pieces.”
I suspect there will be a lot of fish in those Olympic-sized dumpsters.
I suppose when it comes to our freedom of choice, it is all a relative thing, but two things are certain when it comes to the temporary “world’s biggest McDonald’s ever” next to the Olympic Stadium: The world’s biggest chip fryer will be running at a world record pace, and the corporation’s profits will be “Citius, Altius, Fortius!”
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